Handling Bullying the Wrong Way
Children subject to bullying undergo traumatic experiences and usually do not know how to handle the situation either. As a parent, you should ensure that the child becomes knowledgeable about bullying so that she does not make the mistake of handling bullies in a wrong way or not do anything at all.
The first thing the child needs to learn from you is that she is not responsible and it is not her fault. Most children do not know this and develop complexes and emotional problems when subject to bullying. No matter for what reason the victim is sought out for, the victim is never at fault and your child must understand this very clearly. Otherwise, she will suffer from guilt, something that she can well do without. If she knows that the other child is responsible, the chances are that she would open out more to you with information.
Your child must be made to understand that she should not react with counter bullying tactics nor physically assault the bully. She should be taught how to defend herself in a positive way and to get out of the vicious cycle of bullying. Hurting the bully can work temporarily but, the root cause will not be eradicated and it is likely to recur sooner than later. Your child must be taught that taking revenge will be counterproductive.
The most important thing that your child must learn is to confide in an adult at the earliest opportunity. Children normally avoid this for fear of offending the bully and inviting retribution. The child must over come this fear and approach an adult as the best option available. Children, who are victims of bullying, need to be reassured that adults are there to help and must be encouraged to talk to people like coaches and priests.
Bullied children tend to withdraw from group activities. This must be resisted and the child must be encouraged to spend time with her friends and fully participate in all group activities of the school. Being amongst friends also makes it difficult for the bully to approach the child and seeing that this works, the confidence level of the child goes up and long term bullying can be terminated.
A bullied child will try and take her frustration out by bullying weaker children or go into depression. She should be made to understand that this is not a good practice, as it will cause more long-term damage and not quite the right way to solve the problem. The possibility that the child may be subject to bullying because it is presumed that the victim is without recourse to adults should be considered and your child must be given a lot of assurance of your moral and physical support to develop self-confidence and handle bullies effectively.